Every time a couple tackles a thorny problem requiring change, they go through a predictable sequence of steps to make that change. I believe the same sequence happens when parents and children, or even flat-mates, are engaged in solving a problem that requires change. The sequence of change involves a journey from denial to commitment and action; but its not a linear journey, it usually has its share of roadblocks, false starts, unhelpful detours etc, so commitment and perseverance are big factors in success.
Watch the video below to see Pete Pearson and Ellyn Bader go through the stages of change as they conquer the problem of clutter in their home. Pete and Ellyn are the co-founders of The Couples Institute in San Fransisco, and Ellyn was one of my teachers in couples therapy a few years back.
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I enjoyed the video – very informative!
Thanks Almarie.
This is good and very useful. My wife & I after many years, have come to a good understanding our unique and different temperaments and you can see this in this example too.
Thanks Stewart, yes very important to understand that our spouse or partner is not the same as us, and to appreciate them for who they are. But as you say, that can take a few years 🙂
This is so true – I laughed as it seemed so like us at times!!! Thanks Ben. ACTION is such a great word!
Hi Linda, I hope you enjoy today’s post as well.